Thursday, August 14, 2008


That is the report I received today. From two different doctors.

On the contrary, I argued. I think my breasts are quite remarkable. Of course we must excuse the fact that the girls need synthetic fabric and re-bar re-enforcement to take them from National Geographic cover worthy to Cosmo cover worthy. But, unremarkable? That's a little harsh. mean, "Unremarkable" as in, "There's nothing to remark on" as in, "You don't have anything resembling cancer, fibrocystic lumps, calcium deposits or anything else remarkable."

Oh. Well. That's okay then.

***edited to add***
This was more than a simple routine mammogram. During my annual girl check-up the doctor found what she labeled as "suspicious lumps" in my left breast. Turned out to be nothing more serious than scar tissue from my reduction. It was just more prominent and noticeable due to extensive BBSS*. However, it did establish good baseline pictures for my next visit--in four years. And I now know what the jelly feels like in a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

*breastfeeding boob shrinkage syndrome.


Gina said...

Well Dori, the last time I saw your breasts, of course they were covered, they looked darn near fine to me, rather large, but perfectly fine (wink wink).

Great news on your exam!

Melanie said...

I'm guessing you got a mammogram? My OBGYN suggested I start getting them at 35. I managed to get pregnant with Peyton that year and was still breastfeeding the next. Which means I'm up for one this year. Ehhh. Not looking forward to it.

Sean said...

Well we know the parts I find remarkable about you hon, but this is a family blog :D

Amy said...

How could the "frankenboobies" not be remarkable? Perhaps you should get a second opinion! :)