Tuesday, June 2, 2009

On tolerance...

Clinicians have come up with a label for folks like me...Third Culture Kid (TCK). Born of one culture, raised in another thereby creating an entirely separate third culture that is something of a mishmash of the two. Out of sorts with both mother cultures and simply trying to blend in.

"Now...they resolved to go back to their own land; because the years have a kind of emptiness when we spend too many of them on a foreign shore. But...if we do return, we find that the native air has lost its invigorating quality, and that life has shifted its reality to the spot where we have deemed ourselves only temporary residents.

Thus, between two countries, we have none at all..."

~Nathanial Hawthorne, The Marble Faun

Daily I am reminded that my worldview, my opinions, my theories, my philosophies are at odds with popular opinion of my chosen home country, home culture--at times even within my own four walls. But all of those things have been shaped by the life I have lived, the life I have experienced. And they are my own. My philosophy on tolerance, on coexistence, comes from a childhood of being in a vast minority...a white American female in a predominantly Islamic African culture...

One of the most important lessons I've ever learned...just because I'm right, that doesn't make you wrong. Usually. There are those who are so closed and narrow minded that it makes my back teeth hurt.

I have been blessed--or cursed--with an insatiable desire for knowledge. I want to know stuff. About lots of stuff. Religion is one of those "stuffs". I've studied my own. I've studied others. There was a time when I went so far as to embrace another as my own...not for long, but long enough. There's much we can learn from "walking in another's moccasins."

Using myself as a primary example...one cannot be judged by the color of one's skin, one's gender, one's religion or one's country of origin. We are judged by our actions. I was raised an Evangelical pentecostal Christian and I have come back to that. Yet I have never drunk poison, nor have I ever handled a snake in the name of faith.

If we lump every believer of one religion under one label, wouldn't it be hypocritical to not do the same with other religions? Or am I no longer blending in?


5 comments:

Meadowlark said...

We count on you NOT to blend in... for heaven's sake, don't start trying now!

I too struggle with the temptation to make everything into "us versus them", whoever "them" happens to be at the moment.

MissKris said...

Take it from one who's lived her life to the beat of her own drummer as far back as she can remember. It's a good rhythm to go by. Especially now past 50. I never much cared what anyone thought about me beforehand but now it's even less so. I'm not 'in your face' about it...I just quietly go about living, but in a way that makes me content. As to religion, I have been blessed to find what makes me content in that area, too. Not many are...not truly, I don't think. I used to feel - in my young zealous days - that what I had EVERYONE needed because it filled such a need in my soul. But now I've realized what's right for me is right for me. To let the 'other' guy find their own path. Not that I'm not willing to share, if asked. But faith is such a personal, personal thing. A journey unique to each and every one of us, don't you think?

Suburbia said...

I love your philosophy Dori.If only everyone could be more tolerant, the world would be a much better place.

Just realised you have renamed your blog!

S x

Donia said...

blending makes everything mushy...and who wants to drink life through a straw?

Dori said...

I love my big sister!