Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Songs remember...

This afternoon found me sculpting tiny bricks in various shades of purple for a certain little girl's castle birthday cake. Nanci Griffith was keeping me company...a CD I've had forever. As the music poured over me, lost in the task of brick building, my mind wandered back to years ago when this song in particular was my life.

It's a long and dusty road
It's a hot and heavy load
And the folks I meet ain't always kind
Some are bad and some are good
Some have done the best they could
Some have tried to ease my trouble in mind

And I can't help but wonder where I'm bound
Where I'm bound
I can't help but wonder where I'm bound

I've been wandering through this land
Just doin' the best I can
Tryin' to find what I was meant to do
And the people that I see
Look as worried as can be
And it looks like they are wonderin',too

And I can't help but wonder where I'm bound
Where I'm bound
I can't help but wonder where I'm bound

And I had me a buddy back home
But he started out to roam
And I hear he's out by Frisco Bay
And, sometimes, when I've had a few
His old voice comes ringin' through
And I'm goin' out to see him some old day

And I can't help but wonder where I'm bound
Where I'm bound
I can't help but wonder where I'm bound

If you see me passin' by
And you sit and wonder why
And you wish that you were a rambler,too
Nail your shoes to the kitchen floor
Lace 'em up and bar the door
Thank the stars for the roof that's over you

Life is a funny thing...what, with all of the twists, turns, curves and deadly cliffs. But what I've had, what I've experienced, what I've come through? I wouldn't trade it for anything. True, there have been days--months, arguably years--here and there that I would rather not have gone through. However, had I not...would I still be the person I am here and now? I'm content enough with myself and situation that I'd rather not risk an alternate outcome/future by doing away with the offending time frames.

Since we're on the subject of songs (we really are, trust me) sister-from-another-mother, Beth, brought up the subject of "theme songs". Specifically, one's own theme song. My first thought was Bruce Springsteen's "Tougher than the Rest". But upon reflection, while it certainly reflects the now, I think it's too limiting. I think any one song is too limiting. There are songs that fit moments. Fit memories. But fit my life in entirety? I do not believe that particular song has been written. I'm okay with that. And, of course, I can't help but ask the same question first asked by Ms. Blixen...

If I know a song of Africa, of the giraffe and the African new moon lying on her back, of the plows in the fields and the sweaty faces of the coffee pickers, does Africa know a song of me? Will the air over the plain quiver with a color that I have had on, or the children invent a game in which my name is, or the full moon throw a shadow over the gravel of the drive that was like me, or will the eagles of the Ngong Hills look out for me? ~ Karen Blixen

But today? Here and now? I would choose "Ballad of Serenity"...

Take my love.
Take my land.
Take me where I cannot stand.
I don't care,
I'm still free.
You can't take the sky from me.

What about you? What would your theme song be? And, yes, my husband, I am fully aware that your's is Ms. Turner's "Simply the Best". While I do concur (how could I not?), maybe you can come up with an alternate?

Side the post I linked to and realizing the distance we've traveled since then--physically, emotionally, grammatically--and I'm still humbled and awed with the strength of our little family, the support of friends and the obvious hand of God. Simply amazing.

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